Internet Dating
This has won an award for high viewings on Article Niche



Intellifinders - find or find out about
almost anything using our systems

Life Coaching, Counselling, Healing, Thai Foot Massage, Meditation, Divining, Workshops

Personal Development GUIDES by email


Article on Internet Dating by Julia Woodman

I decided to try internet dating to find the man of my dreams, the soul mate I knew was out there somewhere, for these reasons:

  • One of my brothers had met his wife this way, and one of my other brothers had also met some nice people this way. 
    Also some of my friends had enjoyed meeting people this way, and there were other success stories around.
  • Some sites (such as Match) allow you to do very detailed profiles, so I thought it would be more likely that someone might appreciate who I really was.
  • The chances of bumping into someone who would be a good match by randomly going out to various places seemed unlikely. 
    Firstly I would have to like the look of someone enough to start actually talking to them, and then secondly I’d have to take a while to find out if the kind of person
    they were would suit me, and vice-versa of course.

I tried three sites over a couple of years and made several good friends with whom I shared some interests.  My social life looked up,
and I was out enjoying our shared interests and the company quite a bit.  However, I did not meet that special someone I was seeking (not at this point anyway).

The sites were :

  • Match – as already mentioned, with a lot of people with really interesting profiles.
    However, some people didn’t bother filling in their profiles properly, and I thought this was a real shame as it would reduce their chances of finding a good match. 
    A few people did tell unlikely stories, but I either shied away from them altogether, or tested the stories out by email.
  • Single50s – which was obviously for people in the age group I was looking for, as well as being more of a local match up site. 
    The profiles weren’t as detailed, but there was often enough to give you a good idea, especially if people took the trouble to put in details, and it was easy to meet up
    as everyone was reasonably local.
  • eHarmony – I tried this one as my sister-in-law recommended it. 
    She said it was
    a particularly safe one as each party had to ask each other several series of questions before the site would allow direct contact
    (exchange of your own email addresses etc was blocked until you had been through these stages).  However, I found that these questions were not the kind of
    questions I would ask, and I also got some really strange answers, for example I found an abundance of men who said that it was imperative to have 3 baths or
    showers per day.  I did meet one man via this website, quite far from my area, but although we had a lovely evening and seemed to both like each other,
    he was a bit worried that one of my skills is divining, and decided not to meet again.

I did not have any problems with anybody, as I always carefully followed the good safety advice of meeting initially in a public place.  The other thing is to tell someone
where you are going and who with, and to have your mobile phone to hand.  Get a friend to call you at a pre-agreed time to check you are okay.

One unexpected benefit of doing the detailed profile on Match was that I realised that I was nearly 50 and there were a couple of life ambitions I had not yet fulfilled. 
This taking stock of my situation led me to start to exercise a lot and prepare for the trip to
Peru and the 4 day Inca Trail hike I had always wanted to do
I also started Spanish lessons to help with this, a language I had always felt an affinity for.  The other thing I did was to hire a saxophone as I had always wanted to play,
and I ended up buying it and still am learning.

I stopped using the internet dating sites for over a year as I did meet a couple of local people in that time, via friends.  One turned out to have a hugely different
understanding to what a relationship was that it never really took off although we tried twice, and the other I got on very well with (even travelling together), but ultimately
he did not want to live together, so we became just friends, and I continued my search.

I came upon the site Zoosk, via Facebook, and immediately found several people I enjoyed good chats with but never got around to meeting.  Then a man contacted me
who had weird pictures but a personal profile that made me really sit up and notice.  He had only just joined up too. We agreed to meet up on New Years Eve 2009 at a pub
near me. I had never been there before as I hadn’t been living long in the area, but we had to start somewhere.  We spoke on the phone a couple of times beforehand and
things were really going well.  We took one look at each other in the car park, and both of us knew we were meant for each other, and we have not looked back since. 
Those weird pictures did not show what he was really like at all, and his profile had been so detailed and clearly honest (like mine), that we knew before we even met that we had
to be friends.

We got engaged on Easter Sunday and are getting married next month.

So, I do recommend trying it, but the main points to remember are :

  • Take the trouble to present a profile that really shows who you are if you want to meet someone who is going to be a good match.
  • Be careful and take all the recommended safety precautions above
  • Don’t do it for laughs or you might just be taken for a nasty ride… there are obviously people out there who will use you if they think you are open to it.
    Be very clear with yourself about what you are looking for!

Best of luck, Julia


Article on Snooze Papers
for Poetry, Art, Books, plus Workshops on Stress Busting etc, and
Life Coaching, Counselling, Healing, Thai Foot Massage, Meditation, Divining

More original ARTICLES by Julia Woodman

Please go to our TOOLKIT to access these



Positive stuff about improving life & claiming back our GARDEN